"Oh Christmas tree, oh Christmas tree, of all the trees most lovely. . ." - one variation of a popular carol
"Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas.
No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here.
We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f- [edited] Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white a- [edited] down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of a-holes [edited] this side of the nuthouse!" - Clark Griswald, Christmas Vacation
If a tree falls at Christmas and you remember it forever, it becomes a good memory.
Ole Sparky Griswald wasn't alone - we love that movie because it reminds us of (more than)a few of our own Christmas Vacations. If you don't get the reference, please watch the movie - the edited version runs on cable and it's a hoot!
Here are some tree-related memories I've borrowed from my experiences and those of a few close friends to share. It makes me realize how grateful I am for those "Character Building" ghosts of Christmas Past. I'd love to hear some of your awful wonderful memories. . .
I can remember hearing him crying in his room, because we didn't have the money to buy a Christmas tree. I told him, "It's okay Dad. . .we don't need a F*% Christmas tree!" It was the first time I remember saying a cuss word in front of my dad. He just held me and told me he loved me.
We didn't have any money. We drove out into the woods West of town and finally cut the top out of a pine tree. We decorated it with Mardi Gras Beads. It was awesome!
I was feeling a desperate need to make Christmas "perfect" for my kids. We drove out near the airfield and cut a cedar. . .trees look smaller in the woods than they do in an apartment living room. We refer to that one as the "Christmas Hedge."
We got the station wagon stuck in the mud. . .the weight of the tree didn't help. We wound up putting branches under the tires to gain some traction and they caught on fire! We threw mud on the fire to put it out, walked home and called a tow-truck. . .all to save a few bucks on a tree!
Go ahead, branch out with your own story. . .have fun!
1 month ago