Don't Dates Grow on Trees?

"Baby I'm hot just like an oven,
I need some lovin'. . ." - Marvin Gaye

"The Love Boat soon will be making another run.
The Love Boat promises something for everyone. . . " - Paul Williams & Charles Fox


A teenager who needs money can be a convenient and valuable asset. Especially when the need for funds overcomes their general avoidance of anything resembling work.

So when my fifteen year old indicated a disturbing absence of greenage in her wallet the other day, I was happy to provide the answer to her dilemma. . .I unselfishly offered her the opportunity to babysit her five year-old sister.

I promptly called my husband. "We have a date!"

I was so excited. I washed my hair, shaved my legs, found some un-clumpy mascara and lipstick that had not heretofore been mashed into Barbie lips and looked forward to the evening.

We planned a sunset cruise to Peg Leg Pete's at the beach, just the two of us and all that mush. But alas, the best laid plans of girls who shave their legs. . .

The first indication that our "date" was in peril was when the five year old caught wind of our plans. . ."You're going on the BOAT? Without ME?!"

Well, she's small. And my husband is a push-over. We told her she could go, too. When you have four children, sometimes only having one with you is "close" to being alone.

But soon, two more offspring were vying for a spot on the Love Boat, planning to order club sandwiches and oyster po' boys, locating life jackets and something "cool" to wear. I could see the mood deteriorating rapidly. . .(and my daughter wanted to know if she was still being paid! Ha!)

Then the phone rang - our oldest son just calling to say hi, or so he claimed. Then, the real purpose of his call became evident: "So, what's for dinner?"

Eventually, we made it to Peg Leg Pete's for our date - with all four of our kids, my son's friend and his dad. (I reckon there just wasn't time to invite anyone else. . . )

Ah, yes, love is a many splendored thing - but the next time I want a date, I may just have to shake a palm tree!