"So, he asked me if I wanted a frozen banana and I said,'No. . .but later, I might want a regular banana. . .so. . .yeah. . .'"
My sons and my husband were trying to out-"Mitch Hedberg" each other at dinner last night.
"With a stop light, green means 'go' and yellow means 'slow down.' With a banana, however, it is quite the opposite. Yellow means 'go,' green means 'whoa, slow down,' and red means 'where the heck did you get that banana?' "
A few people turned to look at us as if to say, "We are trying to EAT here." I'm afraid my kids have had their dinner training at home. And, there ARE six of us (well, seven if you count the moochie friend.) It was a birthday celebration, too, so we celebrated.
I look forward to dinner time. I always enjoy it when the kids help in the preparation. . .lately, the teens have been noticeably absent from this portion of the ritual with their "impooooortant social schedules" and all - but, with the exception of "Hey Nineteen," we're all at the table on most evenings.
Having a daily family ritual helps to keep us in the know with who's going where when and why and what they were thinking when they did what. Even if it's over grilled cheese and tomato soup (which sounds kinda good, actually.) We dine together between four and seven nights a week.
Yeah, last night's dinner out left me all warm and fuzzy. . .and broke. How can two old people, four teenagers and a five-year-old eat so much?? And why didn't "Hey Nineteen" pick up the tab??
He offers another "Mitchism": "If I'm out to dinner with a group of friends, and somebody offers to pay for the check, I immediately reach for my wallet. Inside is a note that says, 'Say thanks!'. . .So, uh, thanks Mom."
Divorce in Progress
2 months ago