1.04.2008

Necessity is the Mother of Teenagers

From the woman who brought you "Five Minutes Alone"




"If you'd like to ask Mom a question, please wait for the flush!"


comes the "Teen Ticker."



Simply plug the "Teen Ticker" cord into any Ipod, use the convenient velcro apparatus to attach to your child's forehead, and VOILA!

Yes, with the "Teen Ticker" you can read your teen's mind, picking up on even the subliminal messages that you SHOULD have gotten with all the ease of reading the Menu at McDonald's.

"So, sweetie, how was your day?"

"Fine."

Tick, tick, tick: I set fire to the neighbor's cat and sold my little brother to the circus.

*************************

"Honey, is something wrong?"

"No."

Tick, tick, tick: I have a whole list of things that are wrong, but I am going to make you wait four days and possibly secure a "feel better" shopping trip out of you before I divulge them in a tearful meltdown.

**************************

"Mom, I'm hungry!"

Tick, tick, tick: Mom, I'm hungry.





Order in the next five minutes and you'll also receive the "Bed of Nails Alarm Clock." Put an end to those irritating late mornings. . .forever!

No comments: